Reviewed by Alicia Glass
Review Rating: 7
Set ten years after his bout with the Kraken, when the Gods are divided over the release of the terrible grandfather God Kronos, Perseus, demi-God son of Zeus, is pulled out of retirement to stop the end of the world!
Suspend disbelief. Or rather, don’t care about story continuity, attention to detail, or hell even plot really at all. A big big big Baddie in the form of a giant lava monster apparently, is going to escape from some prison and Perseus needs to stop it; that is really the extent of what one needs to know. Beyond that, there’s Chimera to fight, the Minotaur in the labyrinth of Tartarus to kill, and did I mention giant Cyclops that need attitude adjustments? There is of course a dams—well, sort of. There’s a love interest, how about that, in the form of Andromeda, warrior Queen. (She and her entire army struck me as rather Spartan, but lets not get into those nasty details, okay?) Perseus has the Trident of Poseidon to aid him this time, and when combined with Hades Pitchfork and Zeus’ Lightning Bolt, it’s supposed to make the Spear of Triam (I kept thinking they were garbling the word “triumph” personally) which is the only weapon that can stop Kronos. And don’t forget Perseus’ flying horse Pegasus, which was one of the few CGI bits I actually didn’t mind and had no real issues with.
So it’s ten years later from the first movie bomb, Perseus is off somewhere determinedly trying to be a fisherman and raise his son Helius alone. Then apparently due to humanities growing lack of faith in the Gods, a faction arises that wants to release big Bad Kronos from his prison, that divides the Gods against themselves and sets everything to war. Long before any of this stuff, Hades and Zeus and Poseidon had banded together to set Kronos in his prison in the underworld Tartarus, and now Hades and war God Ares, in a pique of fear, switch sides right in the middle and kidnap Zeus to siphon off his power and set Kronos free! Better to reign in Hell, and all that. But wait, this isn’t Hell! (Nor am I out of it. Ah yes, the old jokes are the best.) Not Hell, no, but you can see Tartarus from here, with it’s labyrinth of moving parts apparently created by the forgotten and fallen God Hephaestus. So Perseus and his pals have to brave the underworld to set Zeus free, and then fight against the rising fiery tide of Kronos before he destroys the world! Queen Andromeda and her troops are all ready, but getting hit with sweeping sheets of slag and huge fireballs, while it looks totally awesome, doesn’t do well for your life expectancy.
So that’s the nicest thing that can be said about this movie – visually, it looks great. The movie Gods really stepped up their game in this installation – better costumes, stunning CGI, fight scenes with monsters that will have you cheering! Although, as usual, I don’t give a patootie about 3D, nor did I watch the movie in that fashion despite it being available that way. Nope. The film actually doesn’t need it, the 3D would’ve just gotten in the way of the awesome action sequences. All in all, not wanting to nitpick at everything I found wrong with the storyline, I chose to just enjoy the visual feast and gave the movie a 7. It actually was better than the first one, not that that was hard.